Well, hello.  It’s been a while.  There are a various array of reasons that very well could be true for my extended leave of absence.  For example:

I was in a medical state of unconsciousness

I was lazy and didn’t feel like telling others about my day-to-day shinnanigans

I totally forgot about this thing

or, I was hibernating.

I like to think it is the fourth option, because it makes me seem like a bear, and bears are pretty freakin’ awesome.  Nevertheless, I have decided… whether you like it or not… to continue this… ‘thing’ known as “My Life.”

However, I will no longer be calling it a daily blog.  Instead, it will be called a from time-to-time blog.  But enough of the boring stuff.  To sum up my life from the past LOA, the best information I can provide is - stuff happened.

On this day, 4/24/12,  I am feeling well, but not too well.  It’s always strange when you’re getting over a sickness.  I’m in this period where I’m not complete un-sick, but you’re really not sick anymore… I am just feeling decently well.

This morning, my alarm went off pretty early.  It frustrated me.  I, rather quickly, put a halt to the crowing rooster and decided I can sleep for another hour.  After said hour, I trudged down my steps and began the long drawn out process of capturing DV tape to my desktop pc.  It’s annoying because you hear every single thing you’ve already recorded… in real time.  To say the least, I had more than an hour’s worth of footage to sit and stare blankly at the wall to.  I noticed something about my basement this morning that I’ve never noticed before.  The bottom half of my walls are wood siding painted a beige-ish color, and the top half is like a… a… a fabric-y material with speckles of pink and blue everywhere.  The two materials are separated by a blue, wooden border.  Yeah… that was a long hour.

After that, I began to edit the said captured footage, which took another 2 hours. I normally don’t feel stress, but this week I’m finally feeling it.  You see, This time next week, I will be in the middle of my last week of school… ever. I will be graduating college soon. :]  But enough of that…

After editing, I took a loooooooooooong shower. Yeah, it was great.  Then… school…

… after school.  I came home just in time to eat a bowl of wonderfully delicious sausage and tomato gravy.  Then i got to go to the very last YOKE club of the year. :[  I proceeded to act like a banana - and also various fruits and vegetables -, spin around, play pictionary, play charades, instruct players in the arts of Chug & Crush, and tell middle school students how to evangelize to others.  It was refreshing to hear how many students actually are witnessing to their peers.  A majority of middle schoolers began excitedly spurting stories of people they talked to about Christ.  Aaaaaand, a couple donuts later… Here I am.  A couple seconds ago, I was starting to think about how i should start this thingy, but look where we are now. :]  

and now… a joke.

So, a guy gets a call from his doctor.  The doc says, “I’ve got some good news and some bad news.”  The guy says, “What’s the good news.”  Doc says, “You’ve only got one day to live.”  The guy exclaims, “That’s the good news?!”  The doc says, “Yeah… we tried to call you yesterday, but there was no answer.”

-Jaron

So, it has been a while since I have placed my fingers on the disgustingly awful macbook keyboard.  I apologize, but I have found that I am at an extreme loss for spare time.  Putting into effect now, until August 6th, this may become a weekly blog instead of a daily blog… temporarily.  

Aaaand, today was.. is my birthday.  I would also like to say that I absolutely adored my group at Big Creek this week; they are wonderful people that have a desire to serve others for God.  I admire this greatly.  

So, back to the birthday thing.  This morning I showered, got ready, worshiped, devotionized, prayed with groups, and went to my site.  This is thoroughly condensed.  Today, I inherited 3 packs of Peanut M&Ms, Peanuts, a giant barrel of cheese puffs, a rock… (ya see, jared; this is why it is just ‘alright’), and a big honkin’ box of delicious fried pickles with an iced cold Sprite.  I felt very loved for the first half of the day.  But I can testify that when 200 people constantly tell you happy birthday when you walk down the hall… over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over again… it gets quite annoying.  

We played some epic ultimatez frizbee today.  It was fun.  

Also, worship was incredible tonight.  I found out something about myself, and that something is that I really think I am born to be hardcore.  Not hardcore in the weird kind-of-way, but the oh-my-goodness-sometimes-i-just-want-to-hit-something-kind-of-way.  But in a good way… When I get passionate, and truly experience joy… my first instinct is to want to punch the ground and flail around like a crazy person- just because I can’t express how amazing God truly is.  ghjeyhha5hwjwbeqbeqtgh536yw4rg

<— that last part.. I don’t know what happened, I set my laptop down to look for Kevin’s flashlight, and I came back with it like that.

So now is the time where I really need to get off here to go fellowship with people.  So… I’m going fellowship with people.

Camp Wheresthelake is a place where you have to ‘see’ it to believe it.

-Jaron

Yeah.. the past week I’ve been really busy.  I apologize for the lack of communication between me and the few of you that are interested in the intricate descriptions of my life events.  This past week was the first week volunteers came for Big Creek.  I was in charge of a community group with Sarah and Gary.  It was pretty much very legitimate.  But sadly this week has passed, so I will now intensely describe the day that is listed as the title of this post.  

This morning I was going to attempt to awaken at approximately 6:41 to say au revoir to the volunteers as they venture off into the wild blue yonder, not flying high into the sky, but driving through the mountains away from Big Creek and onward to their respective living locations, BUT my subconscious decided it did not like that.  I punched that rooster in the pancreas.  I woke up at 8, and it was great.  The morning consisted of cleaning to the extreme.  I cleaned the whole cafeteria.  Clean tables, countertops, and floors.  The floor machine is evil; let me describe it.  It is basically a zamboni, except for a floor.  It has two circular brushes that spin while simultaneously feeding solution and vacuuming.  It smells of dirt, and sewage… it’s incredible.  

After cleaning was done, it was lunch time.  We got all the leftovers from the week out and mixed and meshed our own distinct meals.  I went for the ultimate stir fry collage.  Creamy macaroni and cheese, steak, chicken, rice, bacon, and savory shrimp sauce were all fused in the ultimate feast of a plate.  Interesting fact, the plates at Big Creek are, in fact, oven friendly.  Needless to say, my stomach and taste buds were extremely pleased.  

The next 2 hours of my day escapes me.  I can’t remember anything about them… probably because I was asleep… yeah, that was it.

This evening was the same ritual as every saturday evening.  The usual steak n’ shake and wal-mart trip was a success.  Tanner got a pretty sweet watch.  My heart practically broke when I couldn’t find the cheese balls, though.  sadface.

So here I am once again, typing.  In the middle, I took a small break to enjoy YEAH TOAST!!! on YouTube.  It is pretty funny.  Here’s the url. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ru_FIwX1tb8

So, two wrongs don’t make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.

-Jaron

Today was the day, the sun was shining, the tank was clean!  These are the words flowing from Jared Garner’s graceful mouth this morning.  We went to Hyden Baptist Church this morning, which was pretty sweet.  It was the memorial day service for them, so we sang songs like, “Mah kuntry tiz of theyeee” …. according to the wonderful people of Kentucky.  It was great, several people have asked us to come their luncheon next week after church.  They are making hot dogs, and one lady had a very strong argument about the amount of time it takes to fully consume a hot dog.  I will be attending for about 18 seconds- just enough time to fully engulf the delicious meal.  

Also, today is the first day volunteers came in.  Holy wow, it was chaos.  We had this wonderful plan with a video in orientation with the band softly playing music behind it to build into a song, but boy is technology a jerk.  The computer decided it would give us a white screen, so on week one, day one, we went to plan B.  It was awesome though; God had this plan in place.  I don’t really have that much time to blog, so I apologize for the lack of detail I am scribing in this post.  I will catch up tomorrow.

A dyslexic walks into a bar, orders a drink, leaves, and no one was aware of his condition.

-Jaron

Sleeping in was great.  I woke up at 10:40, which never happens at Big Creek.  Today was a rest day, but it was great to practice for a couple hours learning a couple new songs.  This afternoon we went to town.  We went to the family fun center.  And guess what we did?  We had fun as a family at the center.  For only 11 dollars, you can experience the maximum amount of fun.  Crazy, I know.  You can buy fun.  Tanner and Jared obtained a comedic amount of tickets. Jared and I found out that one chain of 800 tickets stretches across a span of about 100 ft.  With these said tickets, an inflatable dolphin, hammer, an alien, and another alien were purchased.  The first reaction of obtaining these objects was to hit everything with the inflatable hammer… including the dolphin… poor dolphin.  Also, I dominate at laser tag.  Just sayin’.  

The best part of saturday is the evening ritual.  Here it is:  Steak n’ Shake, and Wal-Mart.  That’s it.  I got hot sauce, some pens, and a head lamp.  I am very excited about the hot sauce, as well as the pens and head lamp.  So, the first thing I do when I get back to the school is install the headlamp to my head.  The first attempt was an entire fail; the strap broke due to my lack of patience in reasoning through the fact that the strap may possibly need to be adjusted to match the circumference of my head.  Thank you to Chelsea for sewing it back.  Now I feel as if it needs to stay on my head.  You never know when you’ll need light, ya know?  It’s awesome, btw.  It’s a 108 lumens lamp with a visible distance of 51 ft.  It also has a blue and red settings for low light circumstances.  

Also, an epic frisbee match was completed.  This is important.

At about 10:30, the staff realized there is a lot more things to be done, so here I sit in the office scrambling to finish this blog, because it is 12:30, and I will need to wake up early to go to church!  So I am now going to begin my long journey down the long dark hallway.  The ceilings are black and depressing, and the walls are a tan color that is very bland and boring.  It’s a depressing venture down to my bed.

I think i’m out of jokes.

-Jaron

It’s actually the morning of the 28th… but yesterday was a day that needs to be blogged about, so that’s what I’m gonna do. But I’m gonna use words like ‘today’, and ‘this morning/afternoon’ cuz it’d be weird for the title to be may 27th and me use words like ‘yesterday’.  

This morning was somewhat the same, but somewhat different.  We were supposed to clean the building in the morning, so I decided not to shower and sleep in like… 10 minutes later.  Turns out Kevin decided to sleep ‘til 10:30 when we were up at 7:30.  Tsk tsk….    Well, anyway, we turned out going visit sites first, and we were gonna clean the building later.  This is the moment where I go into extreme detail about the next couple hours of my life.

So there are 6 people in community staff, right?  And Tanner’s ridiculous, steel blue PT Cruiser only holds 5 people.  The logical solution would be to take 2 cars instead of piling up into the seemingly spacious PT Cruiser.  As you might have guessed, we did not take logic into consideration at all.  As Tanner and Sarah were perfectly comfortable in the front seats, Ben, Alison, Laura, and I attempted to cram ourselves into the back seat.  Let me attempt to describe this moment.  Laura was completely turned sideways in her seat with Alison practically spooning her… it was weird.  Then I was forced to lean forward in order for Ben to avoid folding is arms in to the point of his shoulders touching.  It’s probably a no-brainer, but there were no seatbelts involved.  Tanner driving=terror for me. (sorry Tanner.)  There were several points when police officers were near where we would have to appear like three people in the back seat instead of four.  Also, there was one point where Alison and Laura decided it would be best if Alison sat on Laura’s lap.  It was an alright plan, but it became very awkward when feet and legs and.. well, let’s just say it was kinda awkward.  I’m pretty sure I did not enjoy that.  Actually, that’s a terrible thing to say.  I think it’d be best to say… I got to know Ben, Alison, and Laura a lot better than I ever thought I would.

After this experience, the rest of my day was still amazing.  I got to spend time with some wonderful people at our sites.  Betty is a wonderful lady that whose husband passed away about a year ago.  She holds memories of him in a couple koi ponds in her yard, but one of the pond liners is torn and leaking.  My heart broke for her as she poured herself out to us, but I am also joyful in the fact that God gave us an opportunity to show His love to this wonderful woman.  I also got to play cards with Jerry from LKLP Compassionate Hearts.  A couple years ago Jerry was hit by a coal truck while driving on the highway.  He suffered slight brain damage, and was paralyzed on his whole left side.  Just over a year ago, he was in a wheelchair.  But it’s amazing to see God’s healing power; Jerry can now walk pretty well, and can also pick up some things with his left hand.

Tonight is going to be awesome; Kevin said we get to sleep in tomorrow, so that’s what I’m gonna do.

another poem:

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I’m a schizophrenic 

And so am I

-Jaron

is not goin t be a very good bloog post.. …..  …mmind is browken at th moment.  mymind is too jujmbled to think whole sentences.  So, here we go.

woke up. no power. shower=dark. sadface. cerealz. lots of work. lots of work. lots of work. gym floor. sweep. floor machine. kittens. lots of work. exhaustion. knees malfunctioning. burgers. tanner arm hair singed. lawl. more work. KAMIKAZE!!!!! it felt like i was gonna die at the end. (haha, kamikaze.) t-shirts. lots of ‘em. 30 min nap. pizza.  acoustic stuff. jaron tired. jaron going to bed.

A horse walked into a bar.  Several people were acutely aware of the potential danger in the situation.

-Jaron

So, instead of starting from the very beginnings of my day, I’m going to skip ahead… partially because I honestly can’t even remember anything before like, 6 hours ago… But partially because I’m mentally exhausted.  Wait… I think I can’t remember anything before 6 hours ago because I’m mentally exhausted.  Yes, that’s exactly it.

Some whiz-bang things happened today.  (I used the word whiz-bang because one time I used thesaurus.com to find a synonym for awesome, and I found it under the word “boss” with the definition “great”, and I’ve always wanted to use that word.)  Instead of helping out with the community ministry today, I joined the construction staff to help build a wall.  Yes, I know, pretty scary.  I got to use a saws-all.  If you don’t know what that is, imagine a really awesome thing that… well, that saws all things put in its way.  Also, I got to sit in a very small box with a bucket of bleach and some rags cleaning.  Also, the box was 35 degrees.  Also, the box was a refrigerator.  It was a lot of work, but I feel great about it.  We took all the stuff off the shelves,  completely extirpated any trace of mold, and sorted through many items of food and condiments.  I found a jar of mayonnaise from Dec. 2010.  It was cool.. probably one of the highlights of my day, hence how I mentioned it here.

Oh, yeah! so remember how I said that I can’t remember things before 6 hours ago?  The bleach may or may have not been a part of that.  Also, I just now remembered that I got a little bit of bleach in my eye.  It was scary.  #ialmostdied 

Worship was great tonight, except for afterwards I was morbidly (yes, morbidly) judged for taking like, 3 minutes to rearrange chord charts while everyone was very much ready to start worship… it was brutal.  Also, I like to make pterodactyl noises? So, I also get judged for that.  No biggie.

I just now realized that every time I go to start a paragraph, I want to start it with the word “so”.  Like this one, but I changed it.. you have to take me at my word.  Aaaand, also this blog has turned more into random stuff than events of my day.  This is a sign I need to stop and go to bed.  

To end this, I decided to write you all a haiku.

Haikus are funny

But sometimes they don’t make sense

Refrigerator

-Jaron

Um.  This morning i woke up 30 minutes before my alarm went off.  My friends Tanner and Jared were being entirely to loud gathering their things to go shower before the prepare for breakfast at an excruciating hour.  Breakfast was biscuits with gravy, eggs, and bacon.  (I personally substituted the gravy with grape jelly.)  

The main chuck of my day was spent sitting in the office at Big Creek making phone calls to create a community ministry schedule for volunteers.  (well, I can’t lie… it was more like I observed people making phone calls.)  We were called back by couple contacts and were completely rejected from visiting residents at nursing home.  Also, I was not mocked about my communication skills while wielding my fear-inducing device known as the telephone as much today.  Other than that… the track group planning time included nothing but singing a couple hymns and surfing facebook.  (note:  not literal surfing.. that’s impossible without water and a surfboard.)

I love food.  The chicken tonight was simply stunning; nice job Adam, bravo.    Not very much communicating occurred during this hour, mostly eating.

Tonight after worship, Tanner and I swapped turns experimenting the effects of bludgeoning (lightly) each other’s knees to make sure our reflexes aren’t broken.  It was pretty fun.  (I’ve always wondered why a nerve in the knee will cause it to kick after being struck… I feel as if this is a very important function of the knee.)

So here I stand (technically sit) trying to think about other things that any person would find important.  Some things I find important may not be very exciting to another individual.  I am also being forced to hurry and finish this blog.  I’m practically at gunpoint, but not really.  So, I’ll leave you with this poem.

Ahem…

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I have a gun

Get in the van

-Jaron

So uhh, yeah.  This is my life.  I woke up this morning at about 7:56, four minutes before my alarm was set to gawk and squawk at me. (literally… my alarm sound is a rooster crowing.  I might add that it causes impure thoughts of violence and destruction towards any object within a 2 ft. radius.  Note:  I might need to change this.)  I stayed in my bed for those four minutes enjoying the peace.  Approaching 8:00 a.m., i heard 4 different alarms go off at intervals of about 8 seconds, mine sounding second.  I really don’t know why i am posting such vivid details of the first 4 minutes of my day, but i deem it necessary for someone to fully understand the functionality of my brain in the morning.  Anyway, one particular alarm continued to sound a marimba melody; it was cool sounding the first seven times it went off, but then it forced me to get out of bed to silence the iPhone 3gs myself due to the lack of the human that once laid there.  Snooze is an evil thing.  

So after that, i took a wonderful shower with some of my friends.  (Ok, that may sound really disgusting, unnecessary, and weird.. but I am currently in a place where shower setting is that of a college dorm- three or four showers per bathroom.)  Conversations are fantastic.  That is all.

My life for the next three months is going to be great.  I am currently serving at Big Creek Missions, a mission center in Kentucky.  I will post more information about Big Creek(BC) later, but now i will stick to my current day.  After the morning ritual, my day got awesome.  The staff members at BC gathered and discussed the book of James in God’s word for a couple hours, then split up and planned for the upcoming summer opportunities.  

I’m going to skip ahead to the moment that fits right in between this paragraph and the one above.  I just had a conversation with AJ that involved hot food items and ferocious diarrhea.  Also, Kevin has intense gas.  

Umm.. now i’m sitting here wondering what to say.  The only thing that comes to my mind in these situations are funny jokes, and The Game.  I just lost the game.  Also, “What is red and smells like blue paint?”  

.

.

.

.

.

.

“Red paint.”

Yep. 

Goodnight.

-Jaron.